Going no contact with your mother isn't some fleeting social media trend, it's the culmination of years, sometimes decades, of a relationship that was never safe or nurturing. When someone makes this painful decision, they're not following influencers or jumping on a bandwagon. They're responding to a lifetime of experiences that taught them their mother could not be trusted with their heart, their boundaries or their wellbeing. This choice reflects the relationship she built with them, brick by brick, interaction by interaction.

The foundations were laid in childhood, through criticism disguised as care, love withheld as punishment or emotional manipulation presented as normal family dynamics. Every time she dismissed your feelings, every occasion she made you responsible for her emotions, every moment she chose her comfort over your safety, she was teaching you that the relationship served her needs, not yours. These weren't isolated incidents; they were patterns that shaped your understanding of what to expect from her.

What makes no contact inevitable is how those patterns continue into adulthood. She doesn't suddenly develop respect for your boundaries, empathy for your struggles or accountability for past harm. Instead, the same dynamics persist; attempts to control your choices, dismissal of your feelings, expectation that you'll continue absorbing her dysfunction whilst offering nothing but criticism in return. The adult relationship becomes a continuation of childhood neglect, dressed up in new forms.

Society's discomfort with estrangement leads to dismissive labels like "trend" because it's easier than acknowledging the depth of harm some mothers cause. Calling it fashionable minimises the courage it takes to walk away from someone who was supposed to protect and nurture you. It ignores the grief, guilt and social consequences that come with choosing your peace over maintaining a toxic connection. Most people who go no contact have tried everything else first; boundaries, therapy, limited contact, endless patience, before accepting that the relationship cannot be salvaged.

Your decision to go no contact wasn't made lightly and it doesn't require anyone else's understanding or approval. It's a reflection of your mother's choices, not your character. You're not part of a trend; you're part of your own healing journey, choosing self-preservation over family mythology. The relationship she cultivated made estrangement necessary, not trendy.

You have every right to protect yourself from relationships that consistently harm you, regardless of biological connection. 

#NoContactIsntATrend #EstrangementIsValid #NarcissisticAbuseRecovery #SelfPreservation #YourHealingMatters