How good people stop being emotional customer service for folks who never tip.
There comes a point in life when you look around and realize…
You’ve been the therapist.
The cheerleader.
The problem solver.
The ride-or-die.
The late-night advice hotline.
And somehow… the moment you need support…
everyone suddenly develops amnesia, low battery, or “sorry I just saw this” energy 🙃
If you’ve ever felt traumatized from helping people who turned around and treated your kindness like a free unlimited resource — welcome. Pull up a chair. Hydrate. We’re healing with humor today.
🤦♀️ The Overhelper Origin Story
Most of us didn’t start out bitter.
We started out kind.
We believed:
-
Helping people was the right thing to do
-
Loyalty would be reciprocated
-
Showing up for others meant they’d show up for us
And for a while… it worked.
Until you noticed a pattern:
You gave grace… they gave excuses.
You gave time… they gave silence.
You gave solutions… they gave chaos.
And suddenly you realized you weren’t helping —
you were enabling a recurring emotional subscription nobody paid for.
😬 The Moment the Switch Flips
Every overhelper has a breaking point.
It’s usually not one big betrayal…
it’s death by a thousand tiny disappointments:
– the friend who only calls when life is falling apart
– the person who ignores your advice but wants you to listen for three hours
– the one who disappears when you need support but reappears when they need saving
And one day you wake up and think:
“Wow… I am exhausted from being everyone’s life raft while I’m quietly drowning.”
Cue the personal growth era.
😏 The Truth Nobody Wants to Admit
Helping people isn’t the problem.
Helping without boundaries is.
Some folks aren’t looking for support — they’re looking for:
-
free emotional labor
-
unlimited patience
-
and someone to absorb the consequences of their bad decisions
And listen… being kind doesn’t mean being available for chaos 24/7.
You’re a human, not a customer service department.
💡 Signs You’ve Officially Entered Your “Help With Boundaries” Era
Congratulations — you may be evolving if you notice yourself:
✨ listening without immediately trying to fix everything
✨ noticing patterns instead of making excuses for them
✨ offering support once — not repeating yourself 12 times
✨ saying “I can’t carry this for you” without guilt
And my personal favorite:
✨ realizing silence and distance are sometimes healthier than another long explanation no one asked for.
Growth looks quieter… and a lot more peaceful.
🤣 The New Rules of Helping (a.k.a. Protect Your Sanity 101)
Let’s normalize:
✔ Helping people who respect your time and energy
✔ Saying no without writing a 3-paragraph apology
✔ Letting adults solve their own problems
✔ Observing behavior instead of believing potential
Because if someone keeps showing you who they are…
believe them the first few times — not the fifteenth.
❤️ Final Thoughts From a Recovering Overhelper
You don’t have to stop being a good person.
You just have to stop being:
– the unpaid therapist
– the emotional dumping ground
– the fixer of self-inflicted chaos
Your kindness is still a gift.
It just needs better boundaries, limited hours, and a clear return policy 😌
And remember:
The right people won’t call you cold when you set boundaries.
They’ll call you healthy.
No comments:
Post a Comment