Both narcissists and Empaths suffered from early childhood trauma. The Empaths took that pain and became more compassionate, not wanting others to suffer the same fate they did. While the narcissists got angry and decided to take their anger out on the world, vowing to put themselves first. Empaths were strong enough not to let the trauma destroy their goodness, while narcissists were weak and let the trauma overcome them.

For the Empath, those early wounds became a source of understanding. They learned to read emotions, sense unspoken pain, and offer kindness where others might have turned away. Instead of allowing their suffering to harden them, they let it deepen their capacity to love. Every tear, every lonely night, and every moment of feeling unseen became a building block in their ability to connect with others on a profound level. They vowed that no one in their care would ever feel as abandoned as they once did.

For the narcissist, the same kind of pain planted a seed of distrust toward the world. Instead of seeing vulnerability as a path to connection, they saw it as a liability. The child who once longed for unconditional love grew into an adult determined to never be hurt again — even if it meant building walls so high no one could truly reach them. Where the Empath’s response was to open their heart wider, the narcissist’s was to shut theirs entirely.

It’s not that the narcissist’s pain was less intense or less real. It’s that they chose a path of self-preservation at the cost of genuine connection. By putting themselves first at all times, they ensured their own survival, but at the expense of empathy, trust, and emotional intimacy. They became masters of control, charm, and manipulation — tools that kept them safe but also kept them isolated.

Empaths, in contrast, understood that true strength lies in staying soft in a hard world. They proved that even the deepest trauma could be transformed into light. Their compassion became their armor, their kindness a quiet rebellion against the cruelty they had endured. Where narcissists saw the world as a battlefield, empaths saw it as a place still worth saving.