You’re Judging a Version That Doesn’t Even Exist Anymore

 

Let’s go ahead and say it with our whole chest: People grow.

Yes. Even the one you swore would “never change.”
Yes. Even the one who used to move immature.
Yes. Even the one stuck in a high school mindset like it was a permanent zip code.

Growth is real. And sometimes? It happens fast.

Life has a funny way of humbling you. A heartbreak. A loss. A breakthrough. A prayer that finally hits different. Getting closer to God and realizing your old behavior doesn’t align with who you’re becoming. That kind of shift can reroute your entire outlook in days — not decades.

But here’s the problem:
Some people refuse to update their opinion of you.

They met you in your “figuring it out” era and decided that was your final form. They screenshot your worst season and treat it like a personality résumé. Meanwhile, you’ve been doing the work. Healing. Reflecting. Praying. Growing.

And they’re still talking about who you used to be.

Let’s be clear — holding someone accountable for harm is one thing. But constantly dragging up an old version of someone who is actively doing better? That’s not accountability. That’s ego. That’s control. That’s wanting someone to stay small because it’s more comfortable for you.

Stop judging someone based on when and how you knew them.

The person you knew three weeks ago could’ve experienced something that flipped their world upside down. A wake-up call. A realization. A moment of clarity that said, “I don’t want to live like this anymore.” And when that shift happens? It’s powerful.

People are allowed to evolve.

You are allowed to appreciate the version of someone you experienced without clinging to it like it’s the only one that matters. That chapter was real. It had its purpose. But if they’re growing? Let them.

And if you don’t resonate with who they’re becoming? That’s okay too. Respectfully move on. No shade. No bitterness. No constant reminders of who they were.

Because here’s the savage truth:
If you preferred someone when they were less healed, less disciplined, less self-aware… you didn’t prefer them. You preferred access to their dysfunction.

Growth changes dynamics. Growth shifts conversations. Growth sets boundaries. Growth sometimes makes you unfamiliar to people who benefited from your old habits.

But growth is still worth it.

People grow.
People change.
People get closer to God and become unrecognizable in the best way.

Adjust accordingly. 💯