Let’s clarify something very important before anyone starts acting like I’m demanding luxury or emotional extravagance:
I’m not asking for much.
I don’t need a yacht. I don’t need a curated picnic in Tuscany. I don’t even need a perfect day with birds landing gently on my shoulder while I discover inner peace.
What I am asking for is significantly more realistic, thank you very much.
Just one outing. One. Singular. Solo or accompanied, I am not picky.
An outing where humanity does not immediately test my patience like it’s a group sport.
Because why is it that the second I leave my house, I enter a live simulation called “How many people can act unhinged in under 30 minutes?”
It’s always something.
Someone is blocking an entire aisle like they signed a lease for it.
Someone is having a loud, unnecessary phone call like we all agreed to participate in their drama.
Someone is standing in a doorway debating life choices while I’m just trying to exist in peace with my snacks.
And suddenly I’m questioning everything—my optimism, my choices, and whether staying home with my blanket and emotionally stable snacks was actually the superior lifestyle all along.
So again, I want to be very clear:
I’m not asking for a lot.
Just one peaceful outing where I don’t have to spiritually detach from reality every 7 minutes to avoid becoming a headline.
One day where people walk like they understand spatial awareness exists.
One day where nobody treats public spaces like it’s their personal reality show audition.
One day where I can simply exist… unbothered, untriggered, and unsarcastic.
Is it too much to ask for humanity to behave like it has at least read the instructions?
Apparently yes. But I remain hopeful.
Delusionally so. 😌
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