We often hear “the rules” from the female perspective. Now, here’s a lighthearted take on the rules from the male side. 🤣 Yep, this made me chuckle and shake my head at the same time!
These are the rules from Men:
1. Please note… these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
2. Breasts are for looking at, and that’s why we do it. Don’t try to change that.
3. Learn to handle the toilet seat. You’re a grown-up. If it’s up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don’t hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
4. Saturday = sports. It’s like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
5. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we’re never going to think of it that way.
6. Crying is blackmail.
7. Ask for what you want. Let’s be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
JUST SAY IT!
8. “Yes” and “No” are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
9. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That’s what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
10. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
11. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
12. If you think you’re fat, you probably are. Don’t ask us.
13. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the interpretations makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
14. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done, not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
15. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
16. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.
17. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
18. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
19. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing’s wrong. We know you’re lying, but it’s just not worth the hassle.
20. If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to, expect an answer you don’t want to hear.
21. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.
22. Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless you’re prepared to discuss such topics as:
Sex,
Sport,
Cars,
or Computers
23. You have enough clothes.
24. You have too many shoes.
25. I am in shape. Round is a shape.
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